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03rd Jan 2017

A conspiracy theorist says 2017 is the year we’re all going to die

2017 is the new 2012


2016, as we’re more than well aware, was a bit shit.

That being said, at least the Earth hasn’t been smashed out of its orbit by some other planet, ensuring the imminent death of every single living being on its surface.

Unfortunately, that’s what’s in store for us in 2017… if you believe certain conspiracy theorists.

David Meade, the author of the book ‘Planet X – The 2017 Arrival’, reckons a star, which he describes as ‘a binary twin of our sun’, is heading in Earth’s direction. The Daily Mail appear to have read a good chunk of said tome, and tell us that the star brings with it a bunch of orbiting bodies (seven to be exact).

One of these orbiting bodies is named as Nibiru – a planet much bigger than ours with a well-established reputation (in conspiracy theory circles, at least) for fucking shit up for planets in our solar system.

As the Mail point out, some believe that Nibiru – sometimes described as Planet X – can be found in the far reaches of our solar system, and has previous for disrupting the orbits of the other planets in recent centuries.

Meade now reckons that with a little help from its own star, Nibiru is being propelled in our direction and is all set to hit us in October of this year.

Of course, there’s conveniently no evidence whatsoever to suggest this rogue star (and its seven orbiting bodies) actually exists. There’s also the small point that nobody appears to have spotted it heading in our direction. But as Meade writes in Planet X News  – a website dedicated to the fictitious planet – there’s a valid reason for this.

‘This system is, of course, not aligned with our solar system’s ecliptic, but it is coming to us from an oblique angle and toward our South Pole.

‘This makes observations difficult, unless you’re flying at a high altitude over South America with an excellent camera.’

For now, we’re confident that Meade’s prediction is, with respect, a complete load of shite. We’ll happily admit we’re wrong though, if it does prove to be true and we all mince meat by Guy Fawkes Night.