It’s not often that you can call an obituary funny.
In fact, we’d go so far as to say that it probably doesn’t really happen at all.
The death of a loved one is an intensely sad occasion.
It’s not easy, and nobody should be expected to take that kind of situation lightly.
That being said, everybody grieves in their own way – some people cry, some people think about all the fond memories they shared with the person, some people try their best to keep going on as normal.
Others write incredible obituaries that have the power to make even the most disheartened of people crack a smile.
That’s what the daughter of Terry Ward did.
When Jean’s dad died last week, she was given the task of writing his obituary.
But instead of writing a regular obit, Jean decided to remember her dad in the best way she could – through humour.
The obituary begins:
“Terry Wayne Ward, age 71, of DeMotte, IN, escaped this mortal realm on Tuesday, January 23rd, 2018, leaving behind 32 jars of Miracle Whip, 17 boxes of Hamburger Helper and multitudes of other random items that would prove helpful in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
“Terry is survived by his overly-patient and accepting wife Kathy, who was the love of his life (a fact she gladly accepted sympathy for during their 48 years of marriage).”
Terry sounded like a stand-up guy to us anyway, Jean.
She goes on to say that her dad met her mother (“the love of his life”) when he was in high school, that he served in Vietnam, and that he used to work for AT&T.
Jean then detailed some of the things that her dad enjoyed most in life.
“He enjoyed many, many things. Among those things were hunting, fishing, golfing, snorkeling, ABBA, hiking Turkey Run, chopping wood, shooting guns, Bed Bath & Beyond, starlight mints, cold beer, free beer, The History Channel, CCR, war movies, discussing who makes the best pizza, The Chicago White Sox, old Buicks, and above all, his family.
“He despised “uppity foods” like hummus, which his family lovingly called “bean dip” for his benefit, which he loved consequently.
“He couldn’t give a damn about most material things, and automobiles were never to be purchased new. He never owned a personal cell phone and he had zero working knowledge of the Kardashians.”
We’ll forgive you for that one, Terry.
“Terry died knowing that The Blues Brothers was the best movie ever, (young) Clint Eastwood was the baddest-ass man on the planet, and hot sauce can be added to absolutely any food.”
Jean ended her obituary by saying that donations could be made in Terry’s name to charity, or your favourite watering hole – “… where you are instructed to tie a few on and tell a few stories of the great Terry Ward.”
Absolutely beautiful.
