Been there.
What, you mean you haven’t set a strict and non-negotiable bunch of rules that your partner must adhere to while they have a bit of fun on their Xbox?
You’re saying you’ve never told your boyfriend he must reply to your texts within 11 minutes?
And you absolutely haven’t made your fella sign a written contract detailing his willingness to pay more attention to you?
Wow, okay then.
One woman who has carried out all of the above is Blake Perry’s girlfriend… and he took to Twitter to share a photo of the contract in all its glory.
The rules themselves were presented to Blake as part of his Christmas present alongside his new copy of XBox game Call Of Duty.
(A popular video game among males of all ages, if you were unaware.)
The rules, if you can’t read them above are as follows:
“1. If I call you must pause game and talk to me with full attention.
2. No starting another match if we are planning to hangout or I ask to hangout.
3. You must ask if it is okay for you to play if I am over at your house. Make sure I have something to do while you are in battle.
4. You must reply to a text no longer than 11 minutes.
5. Do not forget to give me as much attention.”
The contract was then signed by Blake and uploaded to Twitter.
Little does she know these rules will be broken pic.twitter.com/t4WtR30ly6
— Blake (@B_perry_9) December 24, 2017
Now, obviously, this has to be a joke. It is a joke. Nobody would give their boyfriend this contract, expect them to sign it, and take it totally seriously.
Surely not.
Blake has even confirmed himself that the whole thing is a joke in a follow-up tweet.
Incase you couldn’t tell this is obviously a joke
— Blake Perry (@B_perry_9) December 26, 2017
Grand.
That, however, did not stop people from not being able to deal with the contents of the contract and the fact that the ‘rules’ exist at all.
They expressed their amazement on Twitter.
Nah bro… I’ve been through this before, she wants you to think it’s a joke but in reality if you don’t follow those rules she will go postal on you. Just beware
— Daniel Rodrigues (@King_Rodrigues) December 27, 2017
Becareful bro. pic.twitter.com/EcSLd486y8
— GODking♋?™ (@WAJ008) December 27, 2017
Her waiting at 10 minutes and 57 seconds for that text back. ???♀️ pic.twitter.com/tBYVZ6bqNC
— Rae △⃒⃘ (@ItsRavenBro_) December 28, 2017
Blake’s girlfriend, whose name is Ash, even got involved, tweeting that she wasn’t going to “go postal” on her boyfriend but that she appreciated everybody’s concern anyway.
Don’t worry I’m not going to go postal on him ? it 100% was a joke! Thanks for looking out for him though!
— Ash (@ashleydavison22) December 27, 2017
Regardless of whether people accept that the contract is a joke or not, one thing does remain certain…
Joke is on her, you can’t pause cod?
— BB?? (@_ItsBB) December 25, 2017
