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19th Sep 2023

‘My friend is getting married and has a bizarre demand for her bridesmaids’


Surely, we can all agree that this is ridiculous?

A young woman has shared her excitement after being asked to be one of the bridesmaids for a friend – but says she has been asked to do something insane.

Her friend, Zoe, has a very specific idea in mind for how her wedding and bridal party will look, and has demanded all of her bridesmaids have their hair dyed.

And no… not a simple refresh of their own style so it’s looking polished for the wedding, she wants them all to be snow blonde.

The young woman explained: “So I (25 F) am meant to be in the bridal party of my friend Zoe’s (26 F) wedding in December 2024.

“A couple days ago, she met with me and the rest of the bridal party to discuss what the plan was for hair, makeup, dresses, etc. At first it seemed reasonable. She’s going for a winter wonderland type of theme, so blue dresses (all in different shades, lined up as a gradient) with silvery accents, snowflake jewelry and soft makeup, even blue contacts for those of us without blue eyes.

“Last one’s a bit weird, but it’s no big deal to me, I’ve worn color contacts for Halloween.”

After this relatively alright list of demands, the bride then hit her nearest and dearest with the blonde bombshell.

“The bit that ended up being an issue for me is that Zoe requested we all get our hair dyed,” she said.

“A couple members of the bridal group are natural blondes (with dyed ends), and so is Zoe (but she wants to go platinum for the wedding), but the rest of us are two brunettes, a strawberry blonde (she wasn’t “blond enough”?), and a redhead.

“I’m one of the brunettes and I’m the only one in the group who has never dyed or bleached their hair. I’ve considered it, but I can never stay settled on what I want to do, and I’d hate to spend money on something that I end up hating.”

She told her friend Zoe that she would not be dying her hair, however, “she insisted it would be fine, as my hair seemed quite healthy and she would be paying for the bleaching treatments for all of us.

“I again said no, thanks so much, but I can’t. I asked if I could just wear a wig and she said no, that wigs are cheap and unnatural, and she wants us to have our real hair bleached instead of some cheap imitation for the day.

“After more back and forth, she told me I should go home and think about the fact that I’m ruining her vision and that I’d be ruining the photos and wedding video that she and her fiancé (30 M) will be putting together for his grandparents (84 M & 82 F) to view, since they won’t be able to fly in from Argentina. I apologized, paid for my meal, and left.”

Now, she’s asking for people on the outside of this situation to share their thoughts and said: “I really don’t want to dye my hair, but I also don’t want to ruin Zoe’s picture perfect day. I don’t think I’m being difficult or wrong here, but am I?”

People were very quick to back the young woman, and most are telling her to “run” now.

One response read: “I would’ve backed out on the demand to wear contacts. Trying to force others to bleach hair for a wedding? Absurd.

“Just back out now, it’s not worth being part of this crazy Elsa themed wedding. She’s only going to get worse. Run.”

Another added: “She’s worried about a wig looking unnatural?

“Making someone with a darker complexion, with dark hair and dark eyes, into a blue-eyed blonde is going to look really unnatural.

“A wedding is not just a “perfect day” for the couple getting married. It’s also a social event, where the couple are the hosts, and the guests are, well, guests, and need to be welcomed and comfortable.

“It’s clear that your “friend” doesn’t want you, a dark-eyed dark-haired person, in her wedding. She wants cookie-cutter Barbie dolls.”

What do you think? Would you dye your hair for your friend’s wedding if they got to pick the colour?