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29th Mar 2019

Teen girls should be given sex toys to teach them about pleasure, says blogger

It'll help them to know when something is wrong during sex, she argues.

Anna O'Rourke

Whether we like it or not, young teens are having sex – and we should be doing our best to help them understand it.

That’s the message from one prominent blogger, who has said that girls should be taught about female pleasure at a young age.

This will help them get to know their bodies before they start having sex with others, she believes.

Nadia Bokody, a self-described sex-positive feminist, has said that parents must take it upon themselves to educate their daughters on pleasure, including by giving them sex toys.

“Around 30 percent of girls report being in pain when they’re having sex,” she told the Mirror.

A post shared by Nadia (@nadiabokody) on

“So why are they doing it? Because they don’t know what sexual pleasure should feel like.

“I understand people don’t like the fact kids are having sex. I don’t like it either. I do not think at age 14 a girl is truly prepared for the emotional complexities of sex, nor has a sound understanding of contraception and consent.”

Still, the Australian blogger continued, they are having sex regardless and so we shouldn’t bury our heads.

“The best thing parents can do is arm their children with information and create a sex-positive, shame-free environment.

“By allowing your daughters to understand what sexual pleasure feels like, you’re empowering them to know the difference when they’re in a situation where a boy may be being too rough or they’re uncomfortable, and to actually speak up.”

Bokody raises an interesting point.

Sex education is expected to be modernised in Irish schools in the coming years but waiting for this to happen could leave a generation of girls behind.

Though it may be uncomfortable, normalising sex by talking about it could mean the difference between struggling with confusion and shame and having happy, comfortable and safe experiences.