Pot, kettle, etc.
Listen, the definition of clickbait has been utterly trampled on lately. In my opinion, literally everything you put on the internet is clickbait, even a Facebook status is clickbait. You put together a status for the sole purpose of garnering likes and shares, in the same way that websites use headlines for hits.
Ideally, you want to create a small amount of intrigue that compels someone to learn more about a particular story. Personally, I think YouTubers are among the biggest culprits of nonsensical clickbait, especially with the latest ‘STORY TIME’ trend. To demonstrate this, I’m going to share some YouTube videos whilst hazarding a guess at what the video actually entails (without clicking into it because those millionaires don’t need my ad revenue).
1.
What probably happened: This girl went into the chemist for a few hits of Solpadeine. As is standard procedure, the chemist asked her a quick question as to her intentions regarding this powerful codeine.
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2.
What probably happened: The postman called to deliver a small parcel, but nobody was answering the door. He noticed a window was slightly ajar, so he slid the package through the window to save them from having to collect it at the mail centre.
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3.
What probably happened: This bird was getting out of a taxi and didn’t look out the window before opening the door, meaning a cyclist ploughed into the car door and flipped over it. He broke his ribs, but luckily she was ok.
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4.
What probably happened: She had arranged to head into town with her friend Katie, but Katie had to cancel last minute because her dog shit everywhere.
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5.
What probably happened: Her Dad was giving her a lift somewhere, but needed to stop and post a letter really quickly along the way.
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6.
What probably happened: A man in target allowed her to skip ahead of him in the queue because she was purchasing one item, while he had a trolley full of things.
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7.
What probably happened: She went to Zakynthos with the girls and got a touch of sunburn on her left shoulder because Debbie (the dose) forgot to cover that particular area when she was doing her back.
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8.
What probably happened: Her neighbour decided to cut the grass at 8am on a Saturday, while this precious snowflake was having a wee kip for herself.
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9.
What probably happened: There was a quick altercation with Mam when she announced they would be having roast chicken for dinner, when this divil fancied pizza.
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10.
What probably happened: Her roommate finished all the milk.
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