When it comes to sex we all know what we like and what we don’t like. However, we have the tendency to get stuck in sexual ruts – we do the same things over and over again because they feel good and they work for us.
There’s nothing wrong with this (hey, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it!) but not stepping out of your comfort zone can mean that sex becomes boring or, worse still, mechianical – you just start going through the motions.
Here at Her.ie towers we’re firm believers in the old saying that ‘variety is the spice of life.’ If you’ve been feeling a little stuck between the sheets, taking one small step out of your sexual comfort zone can result in one big, leap forward in the pleasure stakes.
Staying in tonight? Why not grab your fella and try one of the following tips?
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Go a little ‘Fifty Shades’ and experiment with some BDSM
1. Take charge: Have you ever considered dabbling in a little BDSM? Now, we’re not saying that you have to start building your very own ‘Red Room of Pain’ ala kinky Christian Grey from the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, but getting a little bossy in the bedroom can heat things up a LOT.
Why not experiment with a little innocent bondage? Tell your man that you’re in charge and he’s going to do everything you tell him to. Get him to lie down and then use one of his ties to blindfold him and another to bind his hands. Keep your knots loose, so he can undo them if he wants to. This lets him know that you’re just having some lighthearted fun and he can stop the proceedings if he feels uncomfortable.
Once he’s all tied up, do whatever your heart desires (within reason). When you’ve had your fun, untie your man and switch positions. If you enjoy your foray into the realms of kink maybe it might be worth investing in a whip or a pair of handcuffs?
2. Invest in some lube: There’s a common misconception that lube is just for gay couples and, ahem, elderly couples. This is definitely not true. In fact, the humble bottle of lube can completely revolutionise your sex life. Experimenting with some lube can intenstify your orgasms and give you a feeling that is out-of-this-world. Plus flavoured lube can put an interesting spin on other parts of your sex life (you know what we’re getting at!).
A little variety can transform your sex life for the better
3. Treat yourself to some explicit underwear: Every woman deserves some fancy underwear and if you don’t have a set of undies that instantly makes you feel like a sex goddess, treat yourself to some. Sexy lingerie can seriously turn the heat up in the bedroom. Buy yourself a cupless bra or a hot silky suspender/stocking set. Explicit underwear is the sexual equivalent of a business suit – it puts you in the right frame of mind for what you’re about to do and you know your man will appreciate it too!
4. Master the art of the tease: If you and your man are guilty of rushing towards the finishing line, practicing delayed gratification can seriously enhance your sex life. Send him a filthy text during the day to tell him what you’ve got planned for the evening. When he gets home, make him wait for a few hours. During this time, flirt with him, have a make-out session but don’t give in to your desires until later. When you finally make it to bed, spend as long as you can on foreplay – the more you draw out the anticipation, the better the sex.
5. Watch one of those films together: According to a host of sex and relationship experts, watching an adult film with your partner can have a positive effect on your sex life. However, it’s important to find something that both of you will like. Do a little research, then curl up and watch it. You’ll either find yourself having a seriously hot conversation or having a laugh over how ridiculous it all is. Either way, it’s a powerful bonding experience and you never know – you might like it.
