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20th Feb 2022

Woman explains why the secret to a happy marriage is sleeping alone

Trine Jensen-Burke

sleep divorce

We all know sleep is important.

So important that not getting enough of it can not just affect your energy levels and mood, but also have dire consequences for your health, weight and even lifespan!

In other words, sleep should be prioritised, which is something Chrissy and Tom Clark, a US couple who have been married for 14 years, have been doing.

By sleeping alone.

Recently, Chrissy took to a TikTok to point out that society should begin to normalize couples sleeping in separate bedrooms.

@tiktockchrissy #stitch with @liddylidds we have been married for almost 14 years! We both need our beauty sleep ? #fyp #marriedlife #seperatebeds ♬ Claire de Lune – Ave Maria

In her viral video that has amassed nearly a million views, the 47-year-old shared a shot of her husband’s room… well as her own, right down the hall.

Needless to say, the video gathered lots of attention, with followers being very divided as to if this was a good idea or not. Thousands of people flooded the comment section with their take on marriage (or relationship) and sleeping positions.

Others, who also admit they sleep better when sleeping apart from their spouse, chimed in too, with one person writing: “Does not mean we don’t love each other. Sometimes it just works better for many reasons.”

More couples agreed sleeping alone was definitively preferable over sharing a bed.

Their quality of sleep improved

According to Chrissy, her husband and she began sleeping in separate beds after she became sick one year and had a persistent cough. “

“Because of my cough, one of us would end up sleeping on the couch or in the guest bedroom. After the cough went away, we kept sleeping in the other rooms because we both had much better sleep for several reasons,” Chrissy told BuzzFeed.

“I need a dark room, and my husband sleeps better with natural light. I sleep better on a firm bed, and he loves the pillow top. We had tried several mattresses over the years and could never find one we both loved. Not to mention his snoring and taking all the covers.”

Since moving into different bedrooms at bedtime, Chrissy said their quality of sleep significantly improved, as well as their moods.

“Sleep quality has improved our marriage,” she said. “I am not cranky, and neither is he. We still cuddle in bed and watch TV, but when it is time to sleep, he will go to his bedroom to sleep.”

She points out that there is no lack of quality time together, as the couple already works from home together, travel together and raise children together.

“Sleeping in separate beds does not equate to a bad marriage. If anything, it improves it for us.”

As for why she wanted to share the video, Chrissy explains that she simply wanted to show her situation, just in case there are couples who feel uncomfortable talking about sleeping apart, or who are afraid to try it, because they feel it would negatively affect their marriage.

“[I think] many couples [sleep apart] and are not comfortable admitting it,” she said. “My husband and I have our quality time awake, and we have our quality sleep time apart. I don’t think that makes us an odd couple. I guess that makes us secure and happy. If there are couples out there considering this, I say go for it. In our marriage, it has made time together just that much more special! I get excited when he comes into my room every morning with a cup of coffee.”

Have YOU tried a sleep divorce? Did it work for you?