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13th Dec 2024

Mum left conflicted after reading her son’s Christmas list – ‘Am I a bad mom?’

Sophie Collins

With Christmas fast approaching, children everywhere are penning their letters to Santa Claus. 

For many parents, the annual tradition of writing to Santa is so much fun – until a surprising or controversial request appears on the list.

This exact scenario happened to Dublin-based mum, Steph Regan, when she asked her son Jack what he wanted for Christmas.

“I said to Jack, ‘What do you want from Santa?’” Steph shared on Lunchtime Live. “He went, ‘You know what? I’d love a gun and a target.’”

At first, Steph didn’t think much of it because Jack had been given toy guns before and it seemed like a harmless request. However, after chatting with a friend later that week, she began to reconsider.

“I mentioned it to a friend over dinner,” she explained. “I said, ‘Well, he’s asked for a gun,’ and her immediate reaction was, ‘Oh no, no, no, no.’”

Steph soon found out that her friend’s reaction wasn’t just her own reservations over the toy. It seems a lot of parents feel strongly about toy guns being inappropriate for children and she said one particular encounter stood out to her.

“He had a little friend over, and they were playing with one of Jack’s Nerf guns,” she explained. “The little boy got really excited and said, ‘Oh brilliant! My Mammy doesn’t let me play with these.’”

Until then, Steph hadn’t given much thought to the implications of toy guns. “I started wondering, ‘Maybe he shouldn’t be playing with guns?’” she said. 

“I didn’t really see a big deal with it,” she admitted. “I didn’t want to make it into a big deal because I feel like if I say, ‘You’re not allowed this,’ it’ll just make him want it even more.”

She went on to say that, “when I saw their reactions, I started questioning myself. Am I a bad mum for letting him play with a toy gun?” 

The debate over toy guns is not new, and opinions vary widely. 

Some parents see them as harmless toys, while others worry they might encourage aggression or desensitise children to violence.

However, research offers some reassurance. 

A 2018 study found no significant correlation between playing with toy guns in childhood and violent or criminal behaviour later in life. 

For many experts, the key lies in context and guidance. Parents who set boundaries and talk to their children about the difference between play and real-life violence can avoid any potential concerns.

Despite this, Steph says the jury is still out. “I’m not sure if people are overreacting,” she said. “I just want to do what’s best for my child without making too much of an issue out of it.”

Let us know what your opinion is on toy guns over on social media? Have you faced the same issue this Christmas?

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