For the most part, being in a relationship during the festive season is awesome. However, one of the major downsides is trying to figure out how to divide your time over Christmas.
What do you do when he wants to spend the big day with his family, you want to spend it with yours but the two of you also want to spend it with each other? It can be hard to figure out how to split your time and, unfortunately, it sometimes leads to some serious fights between you and your beau, you and your family and himself and his family.
Here are some simple ways to avoid the inevitable ‘which-house-do-we-go-to-for-turkey?!’ fight and ensure that your Christmas involves lots of quality time with your family, with his and with your man himself. Relax, it doesn’t have to be stressful at all.
Plan early: There’s no point trying to talk about where you’re going to have your Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve. That’s just a recipe for disaster if you both have differing opinions. Start talking about what you both want right now. Ask your man where he wants to spend Christmas and why he feels that way. This opens an honest chat and you can build an agreeable plan from here.
Think about the logistics: Do your parents live hours away? Are his just around the corner? Which family are you likely to see more often? Will you have to spend a fortune on petrol in order to visit your folks? Will the roads be dangerous? Think about all the logical factors before you make any solid decisions.
Compromise: Remember, you’re looking for a solution that is fair for both you and your man and this will require some level of compromise. Be open to compromises that benefit the both of you, for example, if Christmas isn’t a big deal at your home place but you know it is at his, maybe you can celebrate Christmas with his parents and spend Christmas Eve or Stephen’s Day with yours?
It’s important to make sure that you and your partner are happy with what you agree
Equality: No matter what you eventually agree on, make sure that neither of you ends up feeling short-changed with the arrangement. This will just lead to some resentment that will eventually evolve into a festive fight (which you really don’t want). Try to split things right down the middle so both of you are okay with it.
Make smart splits: If both of you love Christmas day at home, how about spending the morning with his family and the evening with yours or vice versa. Or how about having Christmas Day dinner at your place and a slap-up meal on Stephen’s Day at his place? Another option would be to spend Christmas at his folks’ place and then to spend New Year’s at your parents? See what smart splits you can make.
Alternate years: Another good idea is to agree to alternate years. If you spend Christmas with his family this year, agree that you’ll spend it with your family next year. Or swap your arrangement on a yearly basis. If your parents saw you on New Year’s this year, then agree that they’ll see you and your man on Christmas Day next year.
Host at your place: If you and your man can’t reach an agreement, why not host Christmas day at your own home and invite both families? This way everyone is happy. Just be warned: it requires a lot of hard work in terms of cooking!
