“It is possible to make your dreams come true, and it is possible to change your life if you want to.”
For most people, running away with the circus is a flight of fancy, but for 28-year-old Kourtney Pavlov, that was her childhood.
As the daughter of circus performers, Kourtney grew up in caravans, travelling the country as part of her family’s business.
“I started performing when I was seven years old,” Kourtney tells Her.ie.
“I did hula-hooping, and then as I grew up, I literally did everything you could think of. The clown was sick? I’d do the clowning. The ringmaster couldn’t work that day? I’d do it, no problem.
“When I hit my teens, I started training in aerial, because I wanted to do more thrilling stuff. My last act before I left was the aerial chandelier. There would be a massive chandelier in the air, and I would swing out of it.”
When she hit her early twenties, however, Kourtney began to have doubts about spending the rest of her life inside a circus tent.
“With circus, you can only perform for as long as your body allows you to do these stunts,” Kourtney says. “I worried that when I hit my 40s, I wouldn’t be able to perform anymore and I’d be on the sidelines. I’d probably sell candy floss and popcorn; that is the reality of it. I just didn’t see that life for myself.”
@kourtneypavlov I had the best time performing at Devour the Night! the best audience ever!! thanks for having me 🤘✨🎪 #bestjobever #performerlife #neckspin #stuntwoman ♬ Eye Of The Untold Her – Lindsey Stirling
During a COVID-19 lockdown, Kourtney made the decision to leave, and what followed was a major adjustment.
“The circus world is so different from the normal world,” Kourtney explains. “We don’t really mix with outside people, so it’s really rare for people to leave. I didn’t know anyone outside the circus. It was all I knew – I spent my entire life there. How the heck was I going to adapt to having a new life on my own when I don’t have anyone to relate to or to ask for advice? It was super scary, but the thought of having my future end up where it was going was scarier to me.”
Those first few years were incredibly difficult.
“I had an identity crisis, I was on the dole and I didn’t know what I wanted to do,” Kourtney says. “My social skills had to be readjusted. The only way I can describe it is moving to a new country and not speaking the language, not knowing anybody, and not having a clue what you want to do with your life.”
“I feel like an outsider, and when I was younger, I felt that was a negative thing, but now I feel like it’s my superpower.”
To figure things out, Kourtney looked inward. She found business mentors online, devoured self-development books, and harnessed the skills she developed in the circus to create a business of her own.
“I thought I would be done with performing, but I started my own business in kids’ party entertainment because I knew that’s what I wanted to do,” Kourtney says. “I love entertaining, I love making people happy and I loved working with kids as well. I did a digital marketing course at UCD and learned how to advertise my business and build a website.”
Slowly but surely, business picked up, and Kourtney expanded into developing an agency of her own.
“I’ve given performers a platform to have more work, and I supply entertainers for events and family-fun days,” she explains. “I’ve put on full shows for events, and I’ve turned myself into a circus director – but out of the circus world.”
When she’s not working, Kourtney uses her online platform to connect with others.
“The girl that I was five years ago was so lost and broken, and now she’s living her dream life,” Kourtney says. “I still pinch myself every day because I can’t believe this has happened.
“I started posting on TikTok because I want to speak to anyone who feels lost, or maybe they’re in a situation where their reality doesn’t match how they want their life to look. I just want to share the message that it is possible to make your dreams come true, and it is possible to change your life if you want to.”
She now hopes her story will resonate with her followers.
“I feel like an outsider, and when I was younger, I felt that was a negative thing, but now I feel like it’s my superpower,” Kourtney says.
“I’m a 28-year-old who owns a business and comes from the circus. Most people are not able to relate to that experience, but that’s OK. I wouldn’t change a thing about it.”
