Here in the Her.ie Towers there is a healthy mix of both, taken (not in the Liam Neeson sense) and single ladies (hums Beyoncé song).
When Valentine’s Day rolls around there is a slight divide in office. The Drunk in Love ladies sit to the left and the Independent Women sit on the right… We’re joking, sort of.
Cupid just isn’t as good to some people as he is to others, and it is something that we’ve just learned to accept. There are a few places we’d like to shove Cupid’s stray bows though.
Another Valentine’s Day, another empty-handed postman.
Roses are red, violets are blah, blah, blah…
Single ladies unite, we’ll get through this one together.
Here are the 14 stages of spending Valentine’s Day alone… (FYI: Roses can be other colours than red).
1. You make ‘single’ Valentine’s Day jokes. The very same jokes that you made last year. Pathetic.
2. The over-analysing of past relationships.
3. The philosophical conversation with friends (or anyone that will listen to you).
4. You watch colleagues gush over presents their other halves purchased for them.
5. You run the risk of bumping into an old flame. Alone.
6. ‘Love is in the air’… Friends try setting you up because they don’t want you to spend the big V Day alone.
7. Relatives and family members think it is fine to poke fun at your loneliness. Heartless gits.
8. “We first met”, “aw you guys are the cutest couple ever”, “oh my god he bought you what?!” You are forced to participate in conversations that make you want to vomit in your own mouth.
9. You forget that the world is your proverbial oyster and that there is more to life than a relationship, so you wallow once again in self-pity.
10. What has been seen cannot be unseen. The unnecessary public displays of affection…
11. You reassure yourself that everything is fine and Valentine’s Day is for losers…
12. You reminisce about past Valentine’s Days that were spent in the company of someone else (the asshole ex – we all have one).
13. You repeat the line, “it’s just a stupid made-up day anyway”.
14. You end the day fully convinced you’re going to die alone so you call your other single female friends and go out to numb the pain.
Happy Galentine’s Day, ladies.
