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Wedding

11th Jul 2024

Her Wedding: To invite or not to invite? The plus-one edition

Sophie Collins

Wedding invite, plus-one

The question of whether to allow friends to bring a plus-one to a wedding, especially when you haven’t met their partner, has people split

From close confidants to casual colleagues, the dynamics of the relationship seem to be the deciding factor for many former and soon-to-be brides in Ireland.

We hit the streets of Dublin to get opinions from people on both sides of the argument.

Here’s what they had to say about this tricky dilemma.

Are You Close?

Many people think the depth of the relationship with the friend dictates the decision.

One person told Her.ie: “It depends on how close they are. If they’re a really good friend, I would. If they’re a colleague, no – no offence girls.” 

This sentiment is echoed by another who simply said, “It depends on the friend.” 

Clearly, the bond between the bride or groom and the friend is a significant factor in determining whether a plus-one is appropriate.

Work Friends 

For some, there’s a clear line drawn between personal friends and professional relationships. 

“I think I would. If I knew them, I would. But if it’s someone from the office, like, ‘can I bring my plus one’, I’d be like… ehhh no,” one person said. 

The idea of keeping the guest list limited to those personally known to the bride and groom is a common theme as well. 

Another said: “Maybe people you weren’t so close with could just come on their own.”

The nature of the wedding itself also plays a role. 

If you’re having a more intimate gathering, that often means you’re going to have a stricter guest list. 

“If you’re having a small intimate wedding, like, you’re not gonna want every Tom, Dick, and Harry at it like,” one person noted, emphasising the need to maintain a cozy and personal atmosphere.

Consider Your Budget

Practical aspects such as budget can’t be ignored. 

One pragmatic perspective was, “Yes, because if you want your close friends there and they have a partner, even though I haven’t met him, I still want them to be there. 

“Obviously, it depends on budget though!” 

On the flip side, some argue for trust in the friends’ judgement. 

“I’d have a different view. If they felt strong enough about bringing the partner, I probably would, yes.” 

This suggests a more flexible approach, relying on the friend’s seriousness about their relationship to guide you on the decision.

Definitive Nos

However, not everyone is open to the idea. 

A straightforward opinion was, “No. I think if you haven’t met, they shouldn’t be at your wedding.” 

This clear-cut outlook shows some believe that a wedding should be a gathering of known and trusted friends and family.

Conditional Yes

Some responses fell somewhere in between, offering a conditional yes as an option. 

“I guess if you knew they were serious enough maybe.” 

This suggests that the longevity and seriousness of the relationship could be a deciding factor.

The decision to give a friend a plus-one at a wedding when you haven’t met their partner is a tricky one. 

Let us know what you would do in this situation over on social media.

READ MORE:

Her Wedding: Former brides reveal what they would do differently

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