Brought to you by Eddie Rockets
“Will you shift my friend?”
Growing up as a teenager in Ireland is tough but luckily, we had a few secondary school romances to keep us entertained.
Whether you went to an all-girls school and had to meet the love of your life during lunch break or romance blossomed as you passed notes during Biology, most teenage relationships followed the same course.
1. The pride before the fall
You’ve slowly realised that you have a crush on Dave from the hurling team but God forbid that anyone might know. The only option is to ignore him completely in case anyone catches on.
2. Flirting 101
Meanwhile, Dave is giving the glad eye in the only way he knows how… relentless teasing. It might not be Shakespeare but every good teenage love story began with at least a few weeks of slagging.
3. Getting the shift
It may sound cheesy now but plenty of married couples in Ireland owe their love to those immortal words “will you shift my friend?”. All that pent-up classroom frustration was finally released at the disco, or in a booth in the local Eddie Rockets.
4. The post-mortem
An even bigger event than the shift itself was talking about the shift with your mates in school on Monday. Long before the days of mobile phones (for some of us!), you’d spill the beans on bits of paper passed between desks,.. all while pretending that it was “no big deal.”
5. The mediator
There’s no way you could actually ask John if he wanted to be your boyfriend. Sure, what if he said no? You’d never be able to show your face again! Instead, your wing woman would suss out his wingman in something akin to an arranged marriage.
6. Doing the rounds
The deal’s been done, now it’s time to go public. There’s no better way to tell the slutty Mary in Transition Year to keep her mitts off than doing a round of the school corridors during morning break, or sharing a shake in the local Eddie Rockets.
7. Ringing the house phone
It was far from Facebook we were reared and running down the road with a Callcard became a bit suspicious after a while so eventually, himself would have to man up and ring the landline… keeping fingers, toes and every other flexible body part crossed that it wouldn’t be your father than would answer.
If Valentine’s Day is bad as an adult, it was worse as a teenager… with every loved-up young one showing off her bunch of supermarket flowers or Charlie/So? giftset. Woe betide the lad who didn’t come up with the goods.
9. The break-up
While it may have seemed like the greatest love story of all time, all good things must come to an end and there’s no pain quite like getting your heart broken for the first time. From getting teary when ‘your song’ came on the radio to full-on waterworks when you catch him shifting someone else, we’ve all been there!