What’s the secret to keeping the love alive in a long-term relationship? Apparently it’s all down to physical affection, appreciation and shared experiences, according to some new research.
Researchers at Stony Brook University in New York surveyed a sample of 274 married couples on the state of their love lives. The couples had been married for ten years or more. Researchers asked the couples how in love they were with their partners and to rate the intensity of their feelings on a scale of 1 to 7, with 7 signifying “very intensely in love.”
Surprisingly, 46 per cent of women and 49 per cent of men reported that they were still “very intensely in love” with their partner.
So what’s the secret to staying madly in love then over the long term?
First and foremost, it’s important to be physically affectionate with your partner. Of all the couples surveyed, hugging and kissing their partner ranked as the number one way to keep the fires of passion burning well into old age.
Researchers believe that this is all down to the fact that physical affection causes the body to release oxytocin, also known as the cuddle hormone. Regular physical affection encourages couples to bond over the long-term . Basically ladies, there’s a lot to be said for a daily hug or kiss (yes, even if he’s wrecking your head).
Researchers found that mutual appreciation ranked high when it came to keeping love alive
Secondly, researchers identified thinking positively about (and appreciating) your partner as another common element of long-term couples who were intensely in love.
When we get to know someone, we tend to take them for granted (either consciously or subconsciously). Researchers discovered that the couples who made an effort to consciously appreciate their partner every single day (such as paying them a compliment or thanking them for doing something) reported a higher level of loving feelings than couples who did not do this.
Finally, shared experiences also helped to keep love alive in long-term relationships. The couples who stated that they were still intensely in love with each other reported participating in new, exciting and engaging activities together. The sense of togetherness cultivated by trying something new together helped to bond couples and encourage more loving feelings to occur.
We have to say, we sort of love the fact that at the end of the day it really is all about taking the time to appreciate your other half, spending some quality time with them and having the auld smooch every now and then.
