Search icon

Life

15th Apr 2013

Switch Off, Turn On: Is Your Mind Ruining Your Sex Life?

Is your head in the right place when it comes to sex? If you struggle to switch off, here are a few tips to help you let go for better sex...

Rebecca McKnight

When you get home from a long, hard day at the office it can be hard to put work behind you and enjoy your downtime. Not only is this bad for your stress levels, it can also cause havoc when it comes to your sex life.

Time and time again we’ve been told that for women, your head has to be in the right place in order for those spine-tingling, toe-curling orgasms to occur. If you can’t switch off and turn on (so to speak) you could be doing yourself out of some majorly good sex.

So what’s a girl to do? Thankfully there are a few simple steps that can help you to let go of the day’s stresses and get back on the horse (no pun intended).

_________________

Relax with some naughty daydreams…

Indulge yourself:

If you’ve had a particularly stressful day and sex is still on the cards for the night, one easy way to help you switch off from work is to indulge in a little solo daydreaming.

Head to bed before your man and ask him to follow you in about fifteen minutes. When you’re alone, spend those fifteen minutes fantasising about one of your favourite naughty sceanarios. Whether it’s having sex on a beach or getting up, close and personal with one of your favourite celebs, just let your mind run wild. This will help you to wind down and relax and majorly boost your chances for an awesome orgasm when your partner joins you.

Dismiss your worries:

When you’re engaging in a bit of daydreaming, your conscious mind is likely to bring all your worries to the surface. This is because you’re relaxing. If thoughts about leaving the cooker on or forgetting to send an important email start to plague you, simply take a deep breath, let it out and dismiss the thought. Shut them down before they get too big and ruin your daydreams. Just acknowledge them, relax and let them go.

Don’t overthink your orgasm

Don’t think about your orgasm:

When yourself and your man are having fun beneath the covers the worst thing you can do is to start thinking about your orgasm. Focussing on it will do nothing except drive it away, which in turn will make you feel even more stressed out. According to relationship experts, it takes at least 20 minutes for the average woman to be completely turned on so allow yourself the luxury of time. Take things slow, relax and just see what happens.