It sounds crazy but when you’re in college you sort of think that you’re immortal. Growing old? Ageing? Hell no. You’re going to stay 21 forever and you’re going to have the absolute craic being on the verge of grown-up-ness.
However, aside from death there’s only one other certainty in this life: no matter how much Botox we get, we’re all eventually going to get older. Bummer, right?
The thing about getting older is that it’s a sneaky process. We don’t tend to notice that it’s happening until BAM! We wake up one morning and we suddenly realise that we have our own home, our own family, our own life – when the f**k did that happen?
Thankfully there are a few signs that help us to spot the ageing process as it happens. Here are 10 common signs that show you’re becoming a grown-up.
Your fat pants have become your main wardrobe staple
1. You start to favour your fat pants: Back in the day you’d never be caught outside in your ‘slobbing-around-the-house’ stretchy pants. Now you’re on the sofa and in those bad boys as soon as you get home from work. You’re also guilty of wearing them to the shop. And to social events. And to pretty much everything because they’re so freakin’ comfortable.
2. You’re suddenly jealous of children: You see a group of kids happily playing and rather than your first thought being, ‘Aw, aren’t they cute?’ it’s: ‘Those little jerks. HOW COME THEY GET TO PLAY WHILE I HAVE TO GO TO WORK??!!’
3. You go to grown-up shops: Instead of hitting up TopShop to check out the latest trends, you’re in Dunnes trying to get a good deal on some hand towels that’ll look fab in your bathroom. Oh how you’ve changed.
4. Things don’t ‘magically’ appear in your home anymore: When you were younger your fridge was always stocked with food and there was always a roll of toliet paper in the bathroom. Now you have to actually go to the shop and buy food because you know there’s nothing in there except a mouldy block of cheese. Sad face.
Suddenly everyone you know is engaged
5. First the engagements start… then the babies: All of a sudden your Facebook newsfeed is full of pictures of engagement rings. Then the baby pictures begin (and they never stop).
6. Sleep is more important than EVERYTHING: That amazing party? That film you’ve been wanting to see for ages? Your sister’s birthday? Nope, you can’t make it. Why? You’ll be sleeping. If you don’t get your eight hours every night you’re in bits the next day.
7. Portion control goes out the window: When you were little, your mammy tended to cut you off after you had three cookies. Now there’s no one to stop you so you end up eating ALL the cookies. The same thing happens whenever there’s chocolate, cake and/or crisps in the vicinity.
8. You’ve actually used the phrase ‘Kids these days…’: When you see a group of teenagers doing something stupid/crazy you can’t help but roll your eyes and say the above.
You have plans now? Wtf? When did that happen?
9. You’ve made plans: Plans for the future. Who ARE you?!
10. You do stuff just for the sake of it: You’ll do anything now simply because you can. A jar of Nutella for breakfast? Staying up until 4am for no reason? Who’s gonna stop you?