Rebecca says…
I’m a girl of tradition at heart, especially when it comes to weddings. I believe in the white dress, the first dance and all the rest of it.
But I also think that some wedding traditions have become a bit outdated. Onesuch tradition is the fact that the bride and groom have to spend one last night away from each other.
After all, the reason that you’re getting married is that you want to leave such wild nights behind to embark on a life of married bliss which, in case you didn’t know, is generally spent in the company of each other.
I think abandoning this tradition would also prevent that dreaded situation where the bride is left waiting in the car because her soon-to-be husband is still tied to a lamppost in the middle of town with nothing but a feather boa preserving his dignity! Apologies for the mental image but it had to be done.
I’m not saying that the whole night ought to be spent in each other’s pockets because it is important to have one last night out with just the girls. But surely there will still be nights when you’re married that you’ll get to go out with the girls anyway. Let’s face it your hubby’s not going to want to see the stage show of Dirty Dancing.
So then, what’s the point of this tradition? I would say spend half the night apart doing whatever it is your friends have planned for you but meet up for the other half to enjoy a few drinks together. That way you get the best of both worlds. And after all, you are meant to be out celebrating your marriage to each other!
Mary the Editor says…
Can I just begin by saying my passionate belief on the subject of whether hens and stags should be celebrated together is this: hell to the no.
As a lady who has her own hen in a few weeks time and who is also madly, truly, deeply in love with my husband-to-be (just as well really) there are still things in my life that are ‘just for the girls’ and my hen is definitely one of them.
Much as I adore Himself and have the craic with the lads, there’s a time and a place for group interaction and my hen is not it. Now, I’m not saying for a second that I plan to do anything he would disapprove of but I do want to be able to let my hair down and embrace whatever highjinks my lovely hens have in-store for me without Himself gawping over going, ‘why in the name of Bosco’s box is my wife-to-be pouring baby oil on that half-naked cowboy?’ or vice versa. Morto!
Even when we’re married, there’ll be things he’ll still do with the lads and I’ll still do with the girls because that is what a healthy relationship is all about: loving someone enough to allow them to be themselves and acknowledging how important friendships are. We’ve shared so much and will share so much more in the future that I see no reason and feel no need to lump our celebrations together. Anything else is just smothering each other and making everyone else really awkward – and that’s not romantic or fun.
