Have you heard about Durex’s new product yet? Earlier today, Durex Australia released footage of a real-life couple trialling their latest venture: Fundawear.
Anyway, this got us thinking about all the other sexual gadgets out there that have been designed for couples who are in long distance relationships. Believe us, there are A LOT of toys aimed at this particular demographic. And, as you’d expect, some of them are just plain weird…
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LovePalz:
LovePalz is a “W-Fi-connected love machine that lets both the top and the bottom stimulate some sexy time.” Oh yeah. LovePalz is made up of two parts, ‘Hera’ for the girls and ‘Zeus’ for the boys. Hera is basically a vibrator while Zeus is a sort of sock-like contraption (we’re pretty sure you get the idea here…).
Anyway, the two toys are connected via a smartphone link. When you use them simultaneously , they vibrate in response to the movement. So if he moves, you’ll feel it on your end and vice versa. A word of warning: LovePalz don’t come cheap. They’ll set you back $94.95 for a pair (and you can splash out $10,000 if you want a limited edition, solid gold version).
Kissenger:
Ever wish you could give your long distance love a simple smooch? With Kissenger you can. Kissenger looks like a robotic pig and it is “a physical interface enabling kiss communication.” What this means is that when you kiss the device, the movements of your lips are transmitted to another device so the other person can ‘feel’ your lips on theirs. Think of it as skype, but for your lips only.
Pillow Talk:
We can’t decide if this one is cute or just creepy. Pillow Talk consists of a ring that you wear on your wrist and a little panel that you put inside a pilow. The ring senses when you go to sleep and transmits this to your partner’s pillow, however far away it may be. The pillow then starts to glow. Yeah, apparently a glowing pillow stimulates your partners presence (we don’t get it either). But that’s not all! If you press your ear against the pillow, you can hear your fella’s heartbeat.
Taion Heart:
Okay this one IS cute. Taion Heart is a gadget that allows you to virtually hold hands with your beloved. You simply put the Taion in your hand, give it a squeeze and your pulse rate and pressure are transmitted to your partner’s Taion. The hearts glow and change colours too. It’s sweet, right?
Mojowijo:
Warning: you’ll never look at a Wii remote in the same way again after you read this. Mojowijo “body massagers” work by hooking them up to a Nintendo Wii controller. Once you download the software for the Mojowijo, you can use Skype to transmit your movements to your partner’s “body massager.” Mojowijo have made a point of noting that their toy is “not endorse by or affiliated with the Nintendo Corporation in any way.” Good to know.
