New Mother Sends Out Poem Demanding Gifts For Baby Shower- To The People Who Didn’t Even Go

We know that expectant mothers can be demanding and more picky than usual but this might be where we'd draw the line as supportive friends.  Like every excited new mother, the woman sent out invitations for her baby shower but then unlike any other mother we've heard of (fortunately) she sent out letters again. The letters where addressed to the women who failed to show up on the special day: a poem reminding them that they could (and should) still buy presents. We won't say anymore. Thankfully when one of the women, who describes her only memory with the expectant mom was "sitting next to her at graduation" received the unusual poem, she sent it in on to Mommyish:

We’re sorry you missed the shower! There was fun and games to be had The food and drinks not too bad The loot was a plenty But we looked high and low and found none from you Not even a shiny penny! Babies need a lot Of this fact we all know So we’ve included some shops below! If none are to your liking, and that we understand Then grab a pen and get to writing For checks are to our liking! The [name redacted] Family is registered at these stores and checks [sic] can be mailed to this address.

We hoped that humor or charm could have saved this but no, this could be the most cringe-worthy thing we've seen all day. We get that having a bundle of joy can be life changing and expensive but this cannot be okay. As if that wasn't bad enough the woman is said to have sent the following poem to women whose presents weren't good enough for the mom's taste:

We loved seeing you at the shower Remember how the gifts they did tower? We sorted them for hours Upon sifting and sorting we noticed something amiss For your gift didn’t match the list To fix your situation we listed our stores below But a check could also help us flow!

How are we supposed to believe that these people exist and also, who are their friends?