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05th Nov 2013

“I’ll Be There In Five Minutes!” Eleven Things Irish People Always Say But Never Mean

The lies, THE LIES!

Sue Murphy

As a nation, we are absolutely amazing at conveying exactly the opposite about how we feel about everything. We could be falling apart on the inside, but we will still profess that we’re grand, we could be starving, but still turn down food.

There is no other nation that can do this quite as well as the Irish. Here are eleven things Irish people always say that they never mean.

1. “No, I’m grand.”

Translation: I don’t really want tea or sandwiches or food or any of that delicious cake you have there, I’m totally fine. Well, no I’m not.

2. “Oh, I’ll definitely go.”

Translation: Now, how do I get out of this?

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3. “I’m around the corner.”

Translation: I’m at least an hour away but I don’t want you to leave until I get there.

4. “You’re grand!”

Translation: I’m so mad I could possibly kill you.

5. “I’m leaving now!”

Translation: I’m going to leave when the fun stops here which might be never.

6. “I’m only going for one.”

Translation: I’m going to go for one and if it’s fun, I’m going to stay. No, I’m probably going to stay anyway.

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7. “I’ll be home early.”

Translation: I’ll be home whenever the fun stops but I can’t put a definite time on that so I’m just saying this to get you off my back.

8. “No craic. No, not a bit of news.”

Translation: Except all of the news I am about to describe in great detail.

9. “Ah sure, drop over. Bring everyone.”

Translation: Please don’t come over here.

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10. “Ah sure, can’t complain.”

Translation: Yes I can. I will begin complaining in about two minutes and not stop until you leave.

11. “I haven’t forgotten about you.”

Translation: I have forgotten about you. I’m just telling you I haven’t forgotten about so you will THINK I haven’t… but I did.

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