There are two hard decisions that you have to face in every relationship. The first one is whether or not you should end things if they’re not going according to plan. The second one is if you should give it another chance, especially if you’ve already parted ways.
At some point in our lives, we’ll all be faced with the dilemma or getting back together with an ex. It can be a hard decision to make. For example, can you forgive and forget? Do you believe him when he says he’s changed? And, most importantly, do you want to risk getting hurt again?
If you’re currently being faced with the above decision, here are a few things you should think about first.
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Consider why you broke up in the first place?
What caused you to break up? If you’re thinking about getting back together with an ex, you need to relive your initial break up. What was the deciding factor that you needed to end things? Does that factor still apply now? Think hard about the reasons surrounding your first split and consider whether or not it’s something that you can forgive or live with. Remember, there’s no guarantee that it won’t keep happening.
Why do you want to get back together? Do you still love him? Do you see a future with him? Or are you just worried about being alone. Is he putting pressure on you? The most important thing to realise is that this needs to be your decision and you need to do what’s right for you. Don’t allow anyone else’s opinion to sway you.
Think about your relationship as a whole: When things were good was it a happy, healthy relationship? Did you genuinely love and respect each other? If the two of you spent your time together constantly fighting then you need to ask yourself if getting back together is really worth it.
Can you really forgive and forget?
Can you be friends first? If you’re struggling to make a decision, try being friends with your ex first. This will give you the time to see if his behaviour has really changed or if the dynamic between the two of you is different. It’s a big decision to make and if he loves you, chances are he’ll be willing to try and be friends first.
Actions speak louder than words: When it comes to dealing with an ex never listen to his declarations. Instead focus on his actions. No matter how much he promises that he’ll never cheat again or expect you to clean up after him, it’s important that you take note of how he behaves.
When it comes to relationships, actions determin everything. Is he showing you that he cares? Is he showing you that he’s serious about patching things up and starting again? His actions will tell you everything you need to know.
