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27th Feb 2014

Eighteen Things Irish People Are Really Sick Of Hearing

Living in this country, or even travelling abroad, as Irish people we tend to hear a lot of the same things over and over again. Here are eighteen things that we are sick of hearing on a constant basis, let’s be fair.

1. Oh I love Irish accents…

Really? No one really likes them though.

2. There’s no jobs here.

Nothing. You couldn’t find a job IF you looked for one. Sure it’s the recession (this will also figure in this list)

3. And the weather forecast is…

Rain. Storms. Snow. Great, sure we only love a weather forecast.

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4. I’m not at liberty to answer that question…

Isn’t this just every news report regarding the government pretty much ever?

5. I’ll have to get on the boat.

That’s it. Sure because of the recession there’s no jobs here. I’ll just have to go and get the boat to England. Or Australia.

6. Oh you’re from Ireland? You guys love to party!

We’ve all been abroad and had this conversation at some stage or another. We run into someone who is not from Ireland and the next thing they are asking us about the amount of alcoholics in our country. Great.

7. Do you know…?

Oh you’re from Galway! Do you know my cousin who lives in Letterkenny? No, we don’t know everyone in the country. It becomes really embarrassing when we realise we know their cousin… or their sister.

8. Do you know Niall Horan?


9. My great grandmother was from Ireland!

Brilliant! Half the world is claiming the same thing.

10. You guys love potatoes…

Sure, we don’t even have restaurants anymore. We just sit around in the fields eating potatoes.

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11. Wow, is there leprechauns there?

Yes, everywhere. They call around for tea quite a bit.

12. We’ve turned a corner.

Our various politicians like to roll this one out quite a lot. We’ve turned a corner? To where? The shop? WHERE ARE WE GOING?

13. Recession.

Well, we never hear this word now, do we?

14. Can you Irish dance?

Michael Flatley is my best friend. I spend at least an hour doing a jig into work and going home again. And then reels all the time in work.

15. Will I order you a drink? Guinness?

We don’t all drink Guinness here… No, really.

16. You all hate the English!

Honestly, we really don’t.

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17. Grand stretch.

There’s a grand stretch in the evening, isn’t there? (We will recite this one for about six months until summer. Then it will become, “getting awful dark.”)

18. Do you live on the farm?

We all do. There are no such thing as cities.