Are you unable to say no to every single party invite you get – even if you’re in desperate need of sleep? Do you feel miserable if you pass up an invitation and then hear your friends talking about what a great time they had?
Chances are you’ll have heard of the term FOMO before. FOMO is something that is intrinsically linked to our social-network-driven generation. What it is? Well basically FOMO stands for ‘fear of missing out.’ It is a legitimate fear spurned on by feelings that we are missing out on something important if we pass up a social invite or don’t see the latest film everyone is talking about or don’t buy the latest gadget… you get the idea.
Simply put, when a compelling situation is offered to you, you feel like an outsider or like you’ve missed the opportunity of a lifetime if you turn it down.
It sounds ridiculous, but FOMO is something we’ve all experienced at some stage in our lives. And with the advent of social networking, it’s a problem that’s growing on a daily basis. FOMO is destroying our happiness, ruining friendships and wrecking our self-esteem.
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Symptoms of FOMO
Getting stressed about social invites: If there’s a huge party taking place at the weekend and you haven’t been invited, you start stressing over it way more than is healthy. You wonder why the host doesn’t want you there, you feel like an outsider and you start fretting that you’re going to miss the best party of the year.
Likewise, you sometimes say yes to too many social outings without thinking about the impact they will have on your career, your studying or your health.
You can’t seem to get the balance right between a social life and a personal life.
Throwing away money in order to “fit in”: You hate feeling like an outsider so if everyone else has a brand new phone, you buy one. If everyone else is wearing a pair of jeans that cost €200, you buy them.
You are physically incapable of saying no to a social invite, so even if you’re flat broke you’ll do everything you can to get enough money together so you can go out.
You feel really overwhelmed: When you’re incapable of saying no to social engagements, chances are you’ll eventually start feeling stressed out and overwhelmed. There are suddenly not enough hours in your day and there is too much going on at the same time.
Do you struggle to say ‘no’ to every social invite you get?
Breaking the FOMO cycle
If any of the above symptoms are setting off warning bells for you, there are a few things you can do to help manage (and eventually get rid of) your FOMO.
Unplug from social media: Stop spending so much time reading about all the ‘fun’ things your friends are getting up to on Twitter or Facebook – this will just make your FOMO worse. Take a break from social media for at least a week, or make a deal with yourself that you won’t check it half as much.
Know your limits: You’re only human and as such, you need time to rest and recuperate. Know that missing one night out in favour of sleep doesn’t mean that you’ll miss the best night of your life. Try to calm down your social life so you have enough time to rest. Your health is more important than visiting the latest nightclub.
Start making quick decisions and stick to them: If someone asks you to go out for the night but you know that you shouldn’t, say no and stick to your decision. If you refuse to make a decision for a few days, you’re more likely to be convinced into doing something. When you say no straight off the bat, the decision has been made.
If it’s meant to be, it will happen: A good philosophy to adopt is the following: if you’re meant to experience the opportunity, it will come to you again at some other point in time. Find comfort in this idea.
