9 Things… You’re Guaranteed to Hear During Your Leaving Certificate

Brought to you by Crunchie This month, thousands of Irish students are undertaking the dreaded L.C, and they’ll all hear the same phrases we heard back in the day…  1. No, honestly, I haven’t done a thing! Inevitably said by the one person in your year who will cry if they get 590 points instead of 600. Your greatest battle at this time is fighting the urge to slap them silly. 2. What will you do if you don’t get the points? This person is one you are allowed to slap. Hard. 3. Léigh anois go cúramach ar do scrúdpháipéar na treoracha agus na ceisteanna F*ck. 4. The hard work is done now No, it’s bloody well not! It’s just beginning, actually. So take your condescending remarks and jog on, kindly. 5. Have you got any Rescue Remedy? This will be said on the morning of the exam by the most devil-may-care, chilled-out member of your group of friends. For this mate, the fear comes very late in the day, but when it does, it hits her like a sledgehammer. Be gentle with her, and share your magical elixir.  6. What’s the plan tonight? Said on the morning of the last exam, when your energy is spent, your mind is weary and you generally have zero f*cks left to give. 7. I’ll light a candle for you Can be said by any number of relations and friends of your parents, but the only one that really counts is the one that granny lights for you. Granny lit a candle? Be grand. 8. Thanks for the lovely weather! Said by almost every person in the country who’s not doing the Leaving Certificate, and everyone will say it like they’re the first one to think of it. Just grit your teeth and smile politely, you’ll be saying it next year. 9. It’s not the be all and end all You’ll hear this a million times before, during and after your exams, but the only time it really matters is when your Mam and Dad use it to reassure you right before you head in on that first day. They might have been hounding you to study for the past five years, and told you a thousand times you had their hearts broken, but right at that minute they want you to know they’re proud of you, and however it goes you’ll do alright. And suddenly, you’re in a glass case of emotion. Brought to you by Crunchie - For the mouth that craves the Friday Feeling. Obey Your Mouth.