As a nation, we have certainly come a long way with discussing health and sex matters, but this doesn’t always include pregnancy. It’s almost as if a shroud of secrecy is cast over the event, which we now know is to protect all of us who haven’t had a baby. Having your first child is a really special event, but would you have approached the idea of pregnancy differently if you knew these facts?
1. Morning Sickness
Or what should be called all the live long day sickness. Ever watch a movie and think morning sickness is only a couple of incidents of illness and a complete doddle? Well, you would be wrong. Some women have complained of sickness throughout their entire pregnancy. Yes. Entire pregnancy. Nine months. Constant sickness…
2. Hairy Nipples
When pregnant, your body reacts differently than it normally would, which is, of course, due to the insane amount of hormones that are making your life a daily misery or turning you into that glowing presence. These hormones are also responsible for hair growth and boy, does mother nature like to mess around. You might grow some extra luxurious locks on your head, but as a trade off, hair may start appearing on your chin, upper lip and yes, you guessed it, your nipples. Enjoy that one.
3. Metal Mouth
You weren’t sure if the forces of a universe were playing an extreme joke on you with all this extreme sickness, crying, screaming at people and eating marmalade with coal but the taste of metal? That’s sure to send you over the edge. Often a taste of metal in your mouth can indicate dehydration, well imagine that existing for around three months. Joyful.
4. Pregnancy can help your memory
Because, well, the aging sure isn’t helping… According to a study from Carlos Albizu University, women who are pregnant or new moms are much better at retaining visual information than childless women. So good news, at least you can now find your keys without much effort despite that monumental back pain.
5. Epidurals
The last refuge of the suffering, the wonderful bliss of an epidural but wait, you can request it, that doesn’t necessarily mean you will get it. The epidural is administered through a needle, but it is not always easy to get that needle in correctly! Some doctors eventually give up and natural birth it is! Good luck!
6. Everybody poops
You heard an urban myth about this one but you laughed it off because you thought it only happened now and again. Not the case! It’s bad enough that you’re on that table with everything in plain view for everyone in the room, but now you also have to worry about the fact that you will inevitably lose control of your body functions. Not a myth, it’s the truth.
7. A quick delivery
Here’s a good one and something you might want to pray for. You may have heard those rumours about those wonder women who went into the hospital at 2 and left at bloody 2.30, baby in tow. Well, it’s not all myths. Some women do have a shorter delivery time and surely, that’s the good news! (Will we skip the 23 hour labour stories? Oh, ok then.)
8. You will have a really heavy period
Almost immediately, as if to get you back for those 9 months you didn’t have a period, the floodgates will open. To make it more fun, it’s not going to just be your typical cycle. No, that would take all the fun out of it. No, this epic period will last about three weeks.
9. Baby Weight
Another myth is that as soon as your beautiful baby leaves your body, you will automatically revert back into your previous shape. Well, that’s also a lie. That extra weight is going to be hanging around for quite a while, baby or no baby. Unless you begin training for a marathon the following week and we’re guessing you won’t be up to that.
10. I CAN’T STOP CRYING
You will no doubt be over the moon with your newborn, but those hormones are up to their old tricks so those inexplicable emotions during your pregnancy are going to carry on. Why are you crying at that funny advert on the TV? God knows but you just can’t stop! It’s ok! That’s all perfectly normal.
